Nothing But Tweets

making Twitter pull its birdly weight Welcome to the first edition of Tuesday Time Crush, in which I cravenly avoid the soul-destroying boondoggle of forcing myself to get creative by regaling you with a selection of the witty, cerebral two-hundred and eighty-character bon mots which I have posted to Twitter, the bidet that's convinced it's … Continue reading Nothing But Tweets

Conservatives finally broke the world…

... with help from my mom's new sofa SO I'M SITTING ON MY BALCONY WITH A friend of my friend. The friend of my friend is black, and as we small-talk each other he tells me that he's Canadian, having been born here of parents who emigrated here from Jamaica. This seems totally right and … Continue reading Conservatives finally broke the world…

A Case of Dementia in Squirrels

lost: a few nuts randomly buried under the Statue of Fuckery WHATEVER YOU POST IN AN INTERNET FORUM, no matter how bat-shit insane or obviously fueled by malice, becomes instantly and indisputably true, provided you make your case with the absolute conviction of a Supreme Court justice and the fire and brimstone of a born-again … Continue reading A Case of Dementia in Squirrels

♥♥♥♥ Qu♥tes t♥, like? Live by?!! L♥L!! ♥♥♥♥

Just wanted you to be totally aware that I wasted some of my immeasurably valuable time in my Canadian Tire hip waders, sloshing through the digital swamp that is the "Innernet", and why? Why, the better to direct, albeit remotely, every tedious, one-more-Percocet-to-oblivion waking moment of your sorry life, that's why. OK?  You getting this down and suitably … Continue reading ♥♥♥♥ Qu♥tes t♥, like? Live by?!! L♥L!! ♥♥♥♥

A Beautiful Tangle

My life is a beautiful tangle ofdahlias. Yet how difficult to acceptwhat despair or delightis offered on any given day. I always want what is not offered,yet what is offered could be blessed:only missing my acceptance. What I wanted on this day?to awaken and watch himsleeping, all-gathered, not mine. Instead, these dahlias: Their blood-burst,their unraveling … Continue reading A Beautiful Tangle