PRIDE Goes to the Beach

and other acts of faith



Well, hello there, stranglers! It’s been way too long, but I’ve been busy as the beavers in livery who used to park your Model T Ford at the Royal York Hotel.

I’ve completely revamped my merchandise site, The Future Progressive, and it’s looking sleek and fabulous in its new fonts and colors. And it’s crammed to the attic with PRIDE-themed merch, just waiting for your still-warm credit card or PayPal account to give its—who am I kidding, my—life meaning.

Some food and a pack of smokes wouldn’t go amiss, either.

I’ve chosen as my theme “PRIDE goes to the Beach” and my concept is to re-imagine the pine-scented wilds of Muskoka as a slightly off-kilter tropical paradise, where the flamingos aren’t plastic and stuck in your front lawn by a sign that says, “DANGER! PESTICIDES!” and evenings require a nice, warm hoodie and a copy of THE BOOK.

Speaking of which, I’m offering, until June 30th, my hilarious, desperate-but-never-serious collection of witty personal essays and snarky political commentary for the insane price of $1.99.

You owe it to yourself—oh, who am I kidding, to me—to snap it up. Buy your copy for immediate download and gratification right now, I know how forgetful you are.

If you don’t know about The Book—we must be living under the same rock, so, hello neighbour!—you can find out more here.

I want to get this posted, so stay tuned for more updates very soon.

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